Funny Professor Quote of the Day
You are a proctalgia fugax!
Saturday, January 15, 2011
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My journey through medical school, thoughts on medicine, ethics, specialties, pre-med perils, and advice for those who want to do the same.
“"Virus" is a Latin word used by doctors to mean, "Your guess is as good as mine”
"The difference between an itch and an allergy is about one hundred bucks."
"A patient going to a doctor for his first visit was asked, ''And whom did you consult before coming to me?'' ''Only the village druggist,'' was the answer. ''And what sort of foolish advice did that numbskull give you?'' asked the doctor, his tone and manner denoting his contempt for the advice of the layman. ''Oh,'' replied his patient, with no malice aforethought, ''he told me to come and see you.''"
"He's the best physician that knows the worthlessness of the most medicines" Benjamin Franklin
A man speaks frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"
"Is this her first child?" the doctor queries.
"No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"
8 * 52 = 416
ReplyDeleteI'll assume an average gestation period of 39 weeks
6 * 39 = 234
from which it follows that
416 - 234 = 182
So, she's looking at 182 weeks of not pregnant. Now, let's further suppose that the actual mechanics of fertilization average out to about 4 weeks per pregnancy
182 - (4 * 6) = 158
So, that leaves only 158 weeks over the course of 8 years not being pregnant or waiting until she's able to become pregnant again.
Now let us conservatively estimate that the amount of actual 'contact time' caring for a child amounts to 12 hours per week per parent and that it remains relatively constant over the 8 year period of interest. To simplify the math, let's assume that a new child is added to the equation every 12 months for the first six years.
We then make the following deductions to account for her own care (note that I've assumed no coupling between the two):
1st year - 3.7 weeks
2nd year - 7.4 weeks
3rd year - 11.1 weeks
4th year - 14.9 weeks
5th year - 18.6 weeks
6th year - 22.3 weeks
7th year - 22.3 weeks
8th year - N/A
Net deduction: 96 weeks
Subtracting this from the earlier value we find
158 - 96 = 62 weeks
That doesn't leave a lot of time for medical school and residency.
Haha not the NEXT 8 years.
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