In Stitches by Dr. Anthony Youn ~ a review

Somehow during my surgery rotation I managed to read a book. So it goes without saying that it was a fun read.

The book is written by a Korean-American, Chicago-based plastic surgeon about his journey in medical school and the uncertainties and pressures he faced throughout the process. While his experience was drastically different than mine, it was fascinating to read about the role that pressure from his family played in shaping his medical career... and really his entire life. This is an issue I've been lucky to escape yet I know many many pre-meds and med students out there deal with these outside factors every day.

Regardless... the book is a riot. They guy spends just as much time trying to get ladies as he does studying... and somehow manages to make the entire process of becoming a physician storyteller worthy.

You can find an excerpt on this link In Stitches (an excerpt) . Check it out.

If you don't believe me...

(about the last post).... try this exercise.

Write down every "bad" thing in your life. All of them. Divorces. Arrests. Losing a loved one. Breakups. Failed classes. Financial Ruin. Whatever you got.

Then systematically eliminate every one of them, and how you wouldn't be where you are today. It might not be intuitively obvious. But really think about it.

For example.... (hypothetically)... if you got pregnant at 15, you might feel trapped or at least held back from some of your goals by having a child so early. But delineate it a bit. Were you promiscuous and having a child slowed you down and helped you focus on more productive things? Did having a child at 16 help you develop a better relationship with your parents? Or maybe it got you away from people who weren't healthy for you? Or maybe its something as simple as having a child that early brought you much needed joy and the motivation to do something better?

If you got arrested for drug possession. Maybe it was a turning point. Maybe it saved you from a life of dependent drug use. Maybe it pushed you to help others.

A failed class? Or failed out of college? Maybe you are cosmically supposed to be focusing your talents elsewhere. Or maybe you had a better, more inspiring professor the next time you took the class.

Divorcing the love of your life? Perhaps you developed other friendships that enriched your life more than your marriage. Or you were free to explore the world or a career you couldn't have otherwise managed.

If you really think about it, you can do this. And if you can't think of any good things that came from the bad experiences, my bet is that you haven't yet learned the lesson.

Connecting the Dots

So I've tried to make this point before. But I've never been able to convey it as eloquently or as effectively as Steve Jobs did in his commencement speech at Stanford. If you haven't seen it, do watch it. He discusses how in life you can retrospectively connect the dots and derive meaning from the sequence of your experiences... though the significance of every event is not able to be seen prospectively. Meaning you can't look forward and see how the event in your life will lead you to your ultimate goal. You just have to TRUST.

Certainly thus far this is 100% true in my life, and I would bet yours as well. If my parents had been richer, I would not have had such a circuitous route to college and med school. Possibly I'd have missed out on work experiences that propelled me towards medicine. If I'd not dropped out of college at 19 I may have never worked as a firefighter and never developed my passion for emergency medicine. If I'd have gotten into med school the first time I'd applied I'd have likely gone to a school that didn't fit my personality... and I certainly wouldn't have gotten my masters degree in tropical medicine.... an aspect of medicine I know I want to incorporate into my career somehow. If I'd married a boy that asked me, or if I'd stayed with one that broke my heart... I wouldn't be here today.

Point being? Relax. Just keep going, keep working towards your goal, and trust that the delays, the failures, and the diversions are all part of the big picture.